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Sermon Notes

Sex Outside Of Wedlock

by Dr. Rick Chesher

When we talk about sex outside of wedlock, or outside of the marriage relationship and where this whole idea began, and what it means we most certainly need to go back to where we can find the first marriage if you will. The very first marriage, of course, was the marriage between Adam and Eve, found in Gen. 2:19-25, and we will start there because I believe we need to see the impact of this whole idea of sex and marriage.
Notice, that in Gen. 2:19 we see that Yahweh had formed all of the wild animals and the birds of the sky out of the ground, just as He formed Adam, so we have to look at what the difference between man and the animals are. Look at Gen. 1:27, the difference is that man was created in the image of Yahweh, both male and female. Now to read this in the Hebrew, is to say that Yahweh created man in His image and created man, male and female.
So, hang onto your hat for a minute, because then Yahweh has all of the animals come before Adam to name them, and in that process of naming the animals, Adam finds no helper for himself Gen. 2:20. The Hebrew says that there was no aid, or helper to compliment him. This is interesting to me because apparently, when Yahweh brought the animals and birds before Adam, they all had mates, so Yahweh wanted Adam to recognize his need for a help mate. And this is part of the discussion we are talking about here. Marriage and sex are a much greater topic than most of us realize.
When Adam recognized this issue, Yahweh caused a deep sleep to come on Adam, and Yahweh took one of his ribs and closed the flesh at that point Gen. 2:21. Then it says that Yahweh took the rib and made the woman out of that rib and brought her to Adam, and Adam said, this one at last, is bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh; this one will be called women for she was taken from man. This is really important, the Hebrew word for women is made up of two words one is man, and the other is plural and carries with it the idea of women, and also wife. And in Gen. 2:24-25, says, This is why a man leaves his father and mother and bonds to his wife, and they become one flesh, and they were both naked and felt no shame.
In Gen. 2:24, it says that the man is to cleave onto his wife, the word for cleave in the Hebrew is to be joined together, and to keep one another. So this idea of sex with many people is not the idea that Yahweh is teaching from the beginning of time for mankind, and if you will notice we haven’t even talked about the rest of the Bible, or even the New Testament or known in Hebrew as the Brit Hadashah. Believe me there is so much more to look at as we continue. These are things that Yahweh has and is in the process of teaching us. We have not done a great job in the past in teaching the importance, and the focus that Yahweh has on these things He has established. And it is way past time to dig into the importance of all that Yahweh holds dear to His heart. Remember this, that our relationship with Yahweh is of vital importance to Him, and the relationship that He desires from us is not only to have this with Him, but with each other as well.
I would like to stop right here for just a moment to talk about where we are today, and the idea of divorce in light of what we have just talked about in this Genesis passage and about what this means. If we have become one flesh as described here in this passage, think about the pain of tearing apart the flesh as would be the case as described in this passage. If you have ever gone through a divorce, even if it had been a painful marriage, it is a difficult thing to go through on everyone involved.
In my opinion, this passage in Genesis chapter 1 and chapter 2 are very strong arguments for not having premarital sex since we can really see the heart of the Father in His act of creation and in creation see the intent of His heart. But if you are trying to see things in a more Jewish way, you really hear more about what the Rabbi have to say than about what Scripture does or doesn’t say. So I think we need to talk about what is not only said, but also what is implied or assumed in Scripture. The reason for that is that much of what they do comes from tradition.
Let’s look at Duet. 24:1, now I know that this passage is about divorce but let’s take a hard look at this passage. This verse deals with the husband who has just married his wife, and then finding something unclean about her. This word unclean in the Hebrew means nakedness, shame and unclean or shameful. Now we need to think, why would he divorce her because she was naked before him? Now, when we think about this, it really has to do with her not being a virgin, or having been with another man. But look at Duet. 24:4, if the new husband divorces her for any reason she cannot go back to her first husband because she has become defiled, and it would cause the land to sin.
Now I know that in that case one might argue that it is all about marriage, but what I want you to see is the expectation of the two getting married was, it became a place of sin, otherwise it could not have made the land to sin. Let’s go back to Lev. 19:29, I discussed this in another article I wrote called Sexual Sin In The 21st Century. In Lev. 19:29, I realize that the first of this verse talks about the ideal of sending their daughters out to do prostitution, it also says that it is the sin of fornication or whoredom as we discussed in that article, and fornication is a sin that once again will cause the land to fall into whoredom, and the land will become wicked. And if we look at the land today in America, I believe through teaching our children it is okay to have pre-martial sex, and the killing of our children that is what has happened. America has become a sewer today, and when we try and clean it up, the evil in the land raises his ugly head in opposition of those that are trying to clean up the swamp.
So, when we ask the question, “Is pre-martial sex okay”? I would have to, and all of you probably knew what I would say, what does the Bible as a whole have to say about it? And once again, if we believe that Yahshua (Jesus) Messiah (Christ) is the Son of Elohim and is Elohim then we have to hear how he weight in on this subject as well, and remember He is the ultimate in interpreter of Scripture.
Let’s look at Mark 7:20-23, and this is Yahshua talking, “That which cometh out of the man, that defiles the man. For from within, out of the heart of men, proceed evil thoughts, adulteries, fornications, murders, thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness, all of these evil things come from within, and defile the man.” Now, if you will notice fornication is there and I for emphases sake underlined and italicized that these are evil things according to Scripture and Yahshua, this passage can be seen in Matt. 15:19 as well. Interestingly enough, Mark 7:20, which says that that which comes out of a man is what defiles him, is a reference to Duet. 23:13, which tells the Israelites that when they are in the camp they are to have a scoop on their weapon so they can clean up their dung that comes out of them.
Now the word “lasciviousness” is defined as, inclined to lustfulness, wanton and lewd, arousing sexual desire. And we are going to see these things in passages yet to come as we go through these Scriptural teachings. Now, let’s move on to 1 Cor. 6:9-20, as we look at verses 9-11, Paul talks about those within the congregation being able to make judgements within the body. Paul goes through a list of sins starting with fornicators or idolaters and others, will not inherit the Kingdom of Yahweh. Now that is a stop and take notice moment in our lives if we think this is okay. Paul goes on by saying, and such were some of you. Now I want you to get this, “and such were some of you”. This is important because this phrase, and such were some of you is written in the past form, meaning that they no longer were. The change is that they were now justified in the name of the Master Yahshua, and by the Spirit of our Elohim. So the change was that there had been a change in how they lived after receiving justification by the Master Yahshua and being filled with the Holy Spirit.
Let’s drop down to 1 Cor. 6:15, Paul poses the question, don’t you know that your bodies are members of Messiah? Paul goes on to say that if we are members of Messiah then should we also join ourselves to a harlot? Let’s stop right there for just a moment. The idea of being members of the Body is actually the idea of becoming one flesh with our spouse as we have discussed through Genesis and other places in Torah. So, think for just a minute and think about the implications of being attached to the body and attaching yourself to another person doing acts that are not permissible for the body to do.
Paul goes on to say that what has been joined to a harlot is one body, and Paul quotes Gen. 2:23-25, for the two shall be one flesh. Paul says, but he who is joined to the Master in one Spirit and Paul goes on to say, flee fornication for every sin a man does is outside the body, but fornication is a sin against the body. And Paul goes on to say that we are the temple of the Holy Spirit which is in you, which you have of Yahweh, and says this, you are not your own. We were bought with a price therefore we are to glorify Yahweh with our bodies, and in your spirit which are Yahweh’s.
Look at Gal. 5:19-23, Paul talks about the works of the flesh and sexual immorality, moral impurity, promiscuity and all the rest of the list in this passage of Scripture fit under those that will not inherit the Kingdom of Yahweh. So, in these passages we have seen that Yahweh does not consider fornication as something to be tolerated, but something to stay away from.
Now, as to the idea of why Yahweh allowed concubines and wives is really more of a cultural thing and was practiced in ancient cultures around them and that had laws that even required them to have more than one wife. As we have seen in Genesis 2:4 Yahwehs plan was for one wife. If you will look at David and his many wives and look at how much trouble was caused by those many wives. Solomon who had the most wives ended up falling into sin because he gave into their idols and their worship of other God’s. Abraham who took a second wife to help Yahweh in the plan for Isaac was later on in Galatians to be known as an impulse of the flesh.
Look at Duet. 17:16-20, the Kings of Israel are told not to multiply to themselves horses, and they were told not to multiply wives for themselves because the Kings heart will be turned away from worshipping Yahweh and will turn to his many wives, so even though men in the Old Testament did it, it was not Yahweh’s plan for them to do this.

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